


Elegy

by slamncram (GettheSalt)



Series: Trettien [11]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Fictober, Grief/Mourning, M/M, New Asgard, Norway - Freeform, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Time Skips, Valhalla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2018-10-12
Packaged: 2019-07-29 18:48:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16270199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GettheSalt/pseuds/slamncram
Summary: This is the first day in seven years that Thor hasn't had to fight someone, protect something, or show up to a pre-scheduled international debate. He's been dreading it for weeks.





	Elegy

**Author's Note:**

> Fictober Day 11/31. What does it say when you almost made yourself cry three separate times in less than 800 words?

In seven years, it hasn’t changed much.

Thor supposes he should be surprised by that. After everything the planet had undergone, one cliffside staying intact seems next to impossible.

But Odin had said to remember it, so clearly it was special. Home, he’d called it.

“Not quite yet,” Thor says, quietly, sitting down on the rock. Once, years ago, he and Loki had sat here, with their father between them, and he’d said goodbye. It had been, Thor now realized, the beginning of the end. He hadn’t seen it as that, at the time. He’d been sure of having stopped Ragnarok, sure that Hela could be dispatched. Seven years later, he’d seen the destruction of Mjolnir, and his home world. The death of his friends and family. The obliteration of half the universe’s population, and then the fight that it had taken to reverse that.

There were so many of them who no longer stood, but Thor was not among their numbers. No matter what he’d gone through, he had _endured_.

“It doesn’t seem fair. Thanos was defeated, and after learning how to manage bureaucracy, we’re finally going to have a home here. We break ground tomorrow, start building homes for our people.” He looks to the side, watching the wind blow through the long green and gold grass. Starting tomorrow, New Asgard begins. The Norwegian government, after two years of negotiation, agreed. With T’Challa’s help, building their new home should take no time at all. “As their king, I know this is what I need to do. As myself, though, I’m afraid.

“These past seven years, I haven’t stopped. There hasn’t been time to, not even once we had dealt with the Infinity Stones, because the next battle was this. And, you probably remember, I never took naturally to democracy. I’m told two years is a respectable amount of time to have taken to convince both the world _and_ , in particular, Norway that Asgard will be a benefit. I doubt it would have taken you so long, hm? Just a few weeks, and you’d have charmed them all.”

The only answer he gets is the sound of the wind, and, under that, the soft crash of the waves against the cliff’s base. It’s peaceful, and Thor could stay here for hours. That’s the danger, though. It’s when he stops that things start to come back. The pain, the grief, the ache of knowing his other half is far, far beyond his reach, and will be until he dies.

“I miss you, Loki.” He whispers, sure the wind has snatched the words from his lips the second they’re uttered. He wishes it would take his grief, or, in the least, the tears silently leaving trails over his cheeks. He doesn’t wipe them away. There’s no point, when they’ll be followed by more the second he’s done it. “We would have done this together, you and I. Ruled, cared for our people, founded our new home. You would have been at my side, and I at yours, and we would have been the kings Asgard deserved. The ones they need now. I don’t know if I can do this without you...”

Words fail him, blocked by the lump in his throat, and Thor shakes his head, before putting it in his hands, and giving in to the silent sobs.

This is the danger of staying still too long. Today has been a day Thor has dreaded for weeks. The day between the final plans being drawn up, and the day they break ground. A day with nothing to occupy him, except his loneliness and his grief.

It’s a long time before he lifts his head, again, and stands, finally swiping at his tears.

“I have to, though. It’s what you would have wanted.” Thor looks out at the ocean, again, tracing the horizon and letting his gaze stray up into the clouds. Loki didn’t die the way Odin did. He didn’t have the funeral their mother had. Thor can only hope passing over was easy for his spirit after what his body endured.

“I love you, Loki. I always will.”

Thor leaves the cliffside, unknowing, unhearing. He gets into the Quinjet where Brunnhilde has been waiting for him, and when he looks back, he sees the empty cliffside, nothing else. Not the figure in green and gold, standing next to the rock he’d been sat upon. The barrier between life and death is too thick to allow him to.

Loki knows that.

It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t stand there, sobbing himself, watching Thor walk away to that Quinjet and whispering, “I love you, Thor.”

Valhalla is supposed to be a paradise.

For Loki, without Thor, it is little more than gold-plated anguish.


End file.
